The journey so far..

I walked through the beautiful streets

The roads were paved with granites 

I walked as if I'm the master.

I ignored those who beautified my way.

Insulted some, scolded many.

But I enjoyed my walk. 

Desperate people ran away from me.

I didn't care though.

I walked for kilometers. 

The road was empty and dark.

I was alone.

And it scared me a bit.

A kind fear began to engulf,

Which I never experienced before

I felt drained and exhausted.

I realised my foolishness 

I repelled those who stood with me, 

Those who cared, those who loved...

I showered all my anger at them.

They hanged on, in vain. 

Finally, but not late, 

I realise my mistakes

The damage is irrevocable. 

I admit.   

But the road is still halfway. 

Let the journey continue.

Not alone, but together.

Not as master and slaves,

But as equals.

The road is still halfway...

.................

(011022)

Memories are like a cobweb

Haven’t you seen the spider waiting with his web for its prey?

What about the insects caught in it?

That is how the time entangles us in the cobwebs of memories.

Some memories are like a cobweb. 

It’s difficult to escape from them. 

They will be immersed in those memories like a half-stopped clock hands.

A few may escape. 

But those who couldn’t…, they will shrink and disappear in those moments of memories forever.

By then, the time would be swallowed them… !

Abrupt endings are beautiful than perfect beginning

Sometimes abrupt endings are more beautiful than a perfect start.

Even if it is life or a painting. I mean it when i say it.

There is a saturation  point for everything. Beyond that, nothing will be the same before.  Even if it is personal or professional. Yeah.. Its in these two areas in which iv to take a turn now. An abrupt ending, i would say.

Journalism wasn't mere a profession for me,  its a passion for me. I deliberately chose this. I hope i had done 100% justice to my passion. Started well with keralas leading channel then changed the sign off twice. They were not that much successful, i guess. As my friend once observed, i was not selective and never bothered  about my career. When i sit and think of it,  i realise what he said is right. It was like an high jumper's attempt. Sometimes will cross more height sometimes he may fail. He will keep on changing the target.  It all depends on the motivation from both spectators and his own aggression. Success is even depended on the spectators encouragement. Now i think,  its high time for me to take a second thought on everything. Professionaly iv to take a break or call it a day.  Its not because im lacking any kind of agression and passion. Yeah as everyone says,  its a thankless profession. Anyway im happy that i could do something. Let me work on it. Not sure whether i could implement  it or not. Thats too a big dilemma.

Even its high time to cross some hurdles  which blocked  me even from breathing. I lived in memories and moments than reality, my fault. I never thought il have to pass these long roads in my life. Never thought il leave my foots over various terrains.   Intentionally or accidentally i did. But im not sure whether i enjoyed those imprints or not.  But i lived best at least in them.

I holded fingers when those were in need. I leaned my shoulders when those heads were falling.  I gave my words to those ears longed for it.
Fortunately or unfortunately i rarely saw people lending me a hand at difficult times. No complaints. I know only i can wear my shoes and run. Im good in that.

Depression or mental instability whatever you name it, im used to it.
Infact in life, dont expect things back.  Sometimes its a thankless profession and a thankless world.

Xpect tHe unXpected